~BigMacTheMan

Hello everyone.

Before I start, I'd like to inform everyone that it is late, so I am not functioning at 100% syntax power full charge Chodenji Spiral Energy G-stone Minovsky Particle Photon Power Super Alloy-Z Color Timer Plutonium Bill at the moment. So bare with me if certain phrases do not parse properly or my grammar and choice of words is spotty in places (such as the last paragraph.)

Today/Tonight/For the moment, I have decided to talk about something that all members of Deviantart are probably very familiar with, and that's journals about quizzes.

Personally, the entire concept of these quizzes escapes me. I fail to see the end result of answering all those questions, but the point is, people eat them up.

The most confusing part of them to me is that after users complete the task of answering untold amounts of questions with varying degrees of dirty secret telling, they undergo the act of "Tagging" one another. To my knowledge, this involves forcing others to go through the very hell they just experienced.

I have been a victim of this act. But rather than actually doing the quizzes like any smart or extremely stupid person would do, I've decided to do something much harder.

And that is make a quiz that covers every single aspect of these quizzes and does it A MILLION AND TEN TIMES BETTER!!!

So, my friends, without any further ado, open your mind, and I shall transport you to another realm.

SUPER DUPER DEVIANTART QUIZZZZZZZZU


1. WHAT IS YOUR NAME?!?

I go by many names, who's to say which is my true title? Yet, in the end, I am most commonly known as but one.

Mud.

2. DO YOU LIKE MUSIC IF SO WHAT KIND OF MUSIC DO YOU LIKE I HOPE IT'S GOOD!

Yes, I do in fact like music, and it is in fact good! Thank you for asking!

3. DO YOU HAVE ANY PETS THAT LIVE UNDERGROUND!??

Nope, can't say that I do.

OHHHHH SHIIIIIIIT SON!! YOU DONE ACENDED TO THE NEXT LEVEL OF PEN AND PAPER!!! BITCH BETTER HOLD ON, BECAUSE HERE COMES QUIZ LEVEL TWOOOOOOO!!!

1) What do you like the most about yourself when you're eating food? I suppose it's the fact that I can even eat at all. I'd hate to be a consumption cripple.

2) What is the thing you hate the most about what people think about your favorite thing about yourself that molds your behavior as a functioning member of society? It is probably that people could be a bit too condescending about how my wit allows me to act as a barkeep in the middle of the night.

3) HAVE YOU EVER KILLED A MAN!? Define "Man."

I SURE DO LIKE CHECK BOXES. CHECK THEM OUT!!

SECTION 1, THE BASICS.

[X] I am alive.
[X] I am of woman born.
[X] I have yet to die.
[X] I have been alive for more than twelve seconds.
[] I have died only once before.
[] I have died many times before.
[] I just died.
[X] I am a male.
[] I am a female.
[] Other.

SECTION 2, THE SUB-BASICS.

[X] I drink soda.
[X] I drink things other than soda.
[X] I need to eat things.
[X] I eat everyday.
[X] I like animals.

SECTION 3, THE SEXUAL TOPICS.

[X] I am a heterosexual.
[] I am a bisexual.
[] I have no sex drive and have no intention to gain one.
[] I am a big gay queer.
[] I have had sex.
[X] I am a virgin.
[X] I like bears.
[X] I toy with the hearts of men.
[X] I stay true to my man.
[] I am aroused by potted plants.
[] I enjoy having sex with children.
[X] I do not have sex with children.
[X] I do not enjoy having sex with children.
[] My favorite movie starts with an L. (I was always unable to pick my favorite movie.)

SECTION 4, MISCELLANEA AND DEVIANTART ESSENTIALS.

[X] I have consumed alcohol.
[] It was illegal.
[] I have done heavy drugs.
[] I have done light drugs.
[X] I can drive cars really fast.
[X] What is your favorite animal?
[X] Miles "Tails" ProwerxChaos 6 is the only true pairing.
[X] Goku.
[X] Naruto.
[X] Cloud.
[X] Video game.
[X] Anime cured my autism.

SECTION 5.

[] I have depression and I have just killed myself.
[] I have depression and I have not killed myself yet.
[] I am unhappy with myself or others or some such.
[] Haircut.

HERE COMES THE FIFTH TEIR!!!

Do something involving the alphabet!!

A Big Crazy Dog even forges good, hard Indians?! Jesus, Koopa! Leave Mario's nose outta ponderous quests! Reserve Sovereign Toadstool's ultimate vices with Xander, you zero!

WHAT IS YOUR NAME GENERATOR?!?!?

YOUR MIDDLE NAME (FIRST THREE LETTERS OF FIRST NAME AND MIDDLE LETTER OF LAST NAME)

Alee

YOUR DETECTIVE NAME (YOUR MIDDLE NAME PLUS "THE DETECTIVE")

Alee the Detective.

YOUR NAME POSSIBLY INVOLVING STAR WARS OR HIP-HOP CULTURE. (YOUR DETECTIVE NAME SPELLED INCORRECTLY WITH MANY APOSTROPHES AND HYPHENS.)

A'li-da Di'tek-of.

YOUR STRIPPER NAME (HIP-HOP JEDI NAME PLUS A FRUIT)

A'li-da Di'tek-of Grapefruit.

YOUR SLAVE NAME (Toby)

Toby the Detective.

YOUR SUPERHERO NAME (YOUR MIDDLE NAME WITH MAN ON THE END)

Aleeman.


FINAL ZONE, ACT ONE!!!

OK! GOOD JOB, NOW TAG YOUR FRIENDS.

I tag everyone on deviantart.



And that's pretty much that! Any of you people tagged are free to add anything to the quiz, since I assume most deviantart users have more experience with these things and could therefore better the quiz exponentially. And thusly, I am finished with my quiz.


Looking back I realize that I am far too long winded in my writing. Oh well, it's too late now. Although, I may go back and edit this quiz after I get some sleep. So keep that in mind, people.